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Roxies to Rock Bottom, and my Climb Back Up

…after several possession charges, overdoses, and stolen items, I was convinced that I better try to get some help.

Like most teenagers I went through my ups and downs with social life, mood swings, and drug experimenting. It was only after I finished high school when my parents unexpectedly divorced that I fell into a bout of shock and depression, which I found difficult to cope with. I lost my motivation entirely at community college and hearing about all my friends off having a blast at campus parties I felt even more isolated and hopeless. It's not that I was about to be living on the streets or anything; as both my parents still loved me and provided much. But still, I started trying more powerful drugs like Roxies and Percocet to let me escape from this weird transitional time when everyone seemed to be moving on to greener pastures but me.

Within a year and a half I went from a typical privileged kid from a good neighborhood with the whole world in front of him to a self-centered junkie looking forward to not much aside my next fix. The depression felt unbearable whenever I wasn't using (though I doubted it was still from my parents' divorce.) Either way, it provided me, along with my own physical craving, with a justification for using. The money my rents threw at me, I guess out of guilt over the break up, only fueled my addiction that much further.

I'll spare anyone who reads this all the details of my own version of rock bottom, but lets just say that after several possession charges, overdoses, and stolen items, I was convinced that I better try to get some help. I decided it was finally time to accept my parents offer to help pay for me to go for inpatient drug treatment at a place they had been recommended called Behavioral Health of the Palm Beaches. The detox process went smoother than I expected, mainly from the warmth and helpfulness of the nurse staff. They did everything they could to make me feel comfortable and safe during that pivotal time. Once I began actual treatment, I still initially felt depressed and pretty daunted by the task of recovery that lay in front of me. But all this negativity fell apart piece by piece as I became immersed in different aspects of the program. My therapist Michelle was so helpful in giving me stress and depression coping skills that have made my ability to deal with unexpected problems in life much easier. Interestingly, the more I bared my soul to others and myself, the more my imagined problems disappeared.

I don’t exactly know at what point during my treatment that I started to feel like my old self again. But at that point, I made a personal deal with myself to channel all that negative energy over the last few years into something positive for me to accomplish. On top of this, the food was better than I expected, most of the counselors were very helpful and humbling to talk to with their own harrowing struggles of addiction. I think I benefitted from the EMDR, light and neuro-sound therapy, meditative sessions, but it was the small group sharing, private therapy sessions, guest speakers, and bonding time that really helped me the most. Thank you to everyone for this life changing experience.

Brain R
Jacksonville, FL

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