Running Towards Recovery

Sometimes you need some distance to figure things out. There was a time when I was just spinning my wheels, waiting for a magical cure for my drug abuse. Every time I tried to get my life straightened out, something pulled me back in and got me using again. It was an endless cycle of failure that I seemed doomed to repeat over and over again. For a while, I was having a hard time figuring out what I was doing wrong and why I seemed to be experiencing all of these false starts. I soon realized that my surroundings and environment played a huge role in my substance abuse.

Whether I was fighting with my girlfriend, having trouble at work or struggling to get along with my parents, every setback was an excuse to start using again. To make matters even more complicated, there was no shortage of dealers in my neighborhood that were willing to help me forget all about my troubles. I started off doing weed and ultimately got into some more serious stuff, like meth and pills. Although I never did heroin, I took more than my fair share oxy and hydrocodone. My friends and parents started to notice changes in me and took it upon themselves to stage an intervention.

After I accepted their offer of help, my family arranged for me to enter drug rehab in Florida. At the time I thought it was crazy to go ten hours away for treatment when there were so many facilities in my area, but I soon realized how valuable distance would be in my recovery process. There was absolutely no way I was going to be able to heal in my current environment. I needed to focus not only on getting past my substance abuse, but also on creating a new life for myself. If that meant I had to move to Florida to get myself out of this rut, then I was prepared for that.

I started off in detox, which I\'ll admit, took a lot out of me. It was probably one of the most draining periods of my life, both physically and emotionally. There\'s no question that I would have caved and relapsed without the help of my doctors and nurses. At the beginning of my rehab, I was always expecting to hear about some sort of family or professional drama from someone back home, but I didn\'t. I just did the work that I needed to do and began to formulate a plan for healthy living and long-term success in my sobriety.

Recovery has included the bittersweet reality of cutting a lot of people out of my life. I continue to keep the people that really matter, and who actually helped me get better, close to my heart. Before I entered rehab, I could have gone either way: recovery and progress or addiction and desperation. I was lucky enough to recognize how urgent my situation was and take action. You can do the same. 

Brian M.
Brick, NJ